Thoughts.

Given the recent news of the NCUA (thus far getting an admittedly lesser response than the initial C1 announcement–which is sure to change once the weekend is over), and this particular post by Dusty (even if the blogging has stopped, he’s still worth reading), I’ve been pondering this question over the last couple days.

Whoops. I did say I don’t really know what I’m talking about…I’ll leave it there.
Please feel free to chip in with your thoughts here–apologies to my Aussie readers, I’m not sure how much of this actually has relevance to the way you structure things over there.

Been a while since I had cause to do a tourney writeup…this is less a writeup proper and more a short impression, since it was so brief (one day).

There’s some stuff from the summer version here. The site and condition were pretty much exactly the same, maybe a little rainier, but you get the idea.

I’ve already said my piece on RSD:

1) I’m glad I just graduated and don’t have to make this decision
2) I’m glad the boys left behind weren’t picked in this “elite” group
and don’t have to make this decision.

It’s a good time for all of us on the outside, pontificating and
theorizing–outside of a few recurring themes in discussion, though, I
don’t see most of the RSD chatter leading to much. Idle hands and all
that.

Idle hands.

Check out the candidate statements, audio interviews (after you log in–though I had technical difficulty accessing them. Perhaps because I’m in Japan right now?), and the Huddle’s coverage, too.

Honorable mentions (in my book) go to Todd Leber, who has some great, revolutionary ideas, but whose platform has little else of relevance to UPA members (nothing in his experience or his numerous RSD writings suggest he has an interest in anything short of semi-pro ultimate–making him better suited as, for instance, the president of Major League Ultimate rather than a board member of the Ultimate Player’s Association), and Jamie Nuwer, whose interests are very much after my own heart (Sports Medicine and ultimate and where the two meet), and who has done some great things with the Injury Timeout website (PLEASE look at this site! Be a resource for your teammates. The value of somebody with even a halfway informed idea of how to take care of an injured person is invaluable at practices and tournaments alike!)…hopefully she runs again in the next election.

For those of you who don’t follow RSD (congrats), some pics of college natties are up online. I reserve the right to link to a picture of me (I was very impressed with the quality and quantity of shots of me playing in the Arizona game–incidentally, the best game of my ultimate career).

CP put up some good Dartmouth highlights(from the same website) on his blog, too.

Nothing like reliving the glory day(s).

And so it was that the 25th-seeded pickup team won.

What a great change of pace. After a long denouement to my ultimate career after regionals, with a brief, minor peak against Arizona at nationals, I’d found my passion for play fading (though my fascination with learning and teaching in this sport and otherwise continues as strong as ever).

But a glimmer of hope. Strangely, found it whilst tooling on some 15 and 16 year olds at the summer camp I was working at (perhaps you’ve heard of CTY? More than a few ultimate types got their start playing there, despite the camp ostensibly having nothing to do with ultimate). Somewhere in the flurry of terrible decisions and missed executions, punctuated by goals scored by yours truly (and staff accompaniment), I found it.

What was it? The joy of playing, of course! I had forgotten what it felt like. Those weeks of practice between regionals and nationals–they weren’t joyful. They were focused, they were dedicated to improving ourselves. They were work. Even at nationals, that sense of work stuck. Only when I could bring it all to fruition and really play in Colorado did it all mean something.

Similarly, I’d been tooling around with my throws, sure, thinking a lot about ultimate, yes, but I’d been missing the joy. The dam started leaking tooling on the teenagers, and the trickle became a river playing in Ow My Knee, tooling on dults.

Why lie. It’s a lot of fun to be good. It’s easy when you win. Playing this weekend, with a team of friends who not only played, but were damn good, was EXACTLY what I needed.

Particularly on Sunday, when we played legitimate mixed teams, that practice, and take themselves seriously, it was great to go and chill, pile together, and drink water during timeouts and halftime while our opponents huddled together and talked strategy. And then go back out and beat them (like our come-from-behind, universe point victory over 7 express in the final–we were down something like 7-10 when the cap horn sounded).

This is less a recap and more a rejoicing–this is why I play ultimate. I had my doubts about playing elite when I return stateside (and easing those doubts is not a guarantee that I’ll feel any more confident in a year’s time when I get back from Japan, where I’m teaching English next year), but my passion has been re-invigorated.

College is impossible to recapture–the people, the community, the commitment were all so different than anything I could hope to ever find again–but playing in OMK reminded me of the other aspect, that part that drew m to Dartmouth Ultimate in the first place–not the Dartmouth, but the ultimate. I love this sport.

What to say.

My collegiate career is over.

Soon enough I’ll be leaving this school, separating from my friends of many years, and moving on with my life.

What’s it all for? What’s it all about? I struggled with this thought on Friday. We had already made the national tournament., only the second time our program has done so, and going into the year we never really had any concrete goals outside of peaking at regionals–and what a peak it was! Two of the best, most emotional days of ultimate I’ve ever experienced. The energy was palpable. We had bunches of alums, friends, family (my parents got to watch me play ultimate for the first time in the regional final), all rooting for us. It’s the sort of atmosphere that makes me happy to play this sport, to know that the work and effort I’d invested could be made manifest in such a way.

We won the region…and then? What? More ultimate. As Socks put it at one point, it’s like having a really good friend over to visit, you have a great time seeing them, and then the time comes for them to go…and after leaving in the morning, you get a knock on your door that afternoon–your friend is back, he missed his train. While it’s still really great to have them there, it’s just not the same. This was how I went through practice the week after regionals. Closing in on the dance itself, we had a team meeting, generally got on the same page of loving the chance to play with each other and be the Pain Train in its current form one last time, and I had a bit more vigor and a bit more excitement for the sport as we left for Colorado.

But Friday came, and I was flat. We opened against Carleton–very good, talented team–but I got caught flat-footed and beat to the open side more than once. For goals. Where was the fire? The desire to put it on the line for my teammates?

I was still missing it against Colorado. I’d gotten a bit more will to play and work to show on the field, but the focus was missing. I cheered on the sidelines, but that was mostly just going through the motions.

We finished against UCSC after a bye. We won this one, but did I really bring anything more than I did to the previous two games? I had more opportunities to play harder, so in aggregate, yes, I played harder. It was good to win, but I could have just as easily lost that game, in terms of investment in the result.

I still don’t have a good answer for how I felt.

But then, Saturday came. Arizona. What a game. I spent most of the game covering Joe Kershner, whose name you might recognize as the top of the heap in this year’s Callahan award. Really great guy, totally deserving. First point of the game we introduced ourselves to each other, and exchanged some words over the course of the game. Dude knows how to ball, but I do too, which made it a lot of fun on both sides of the disc. Getting to run him around on the turns was great–probably half of my elation from playing this game stems from my being a cutter for almost all of the game.

An amazing game to play in–my new best game I’ve ever played in (supplanting my sophomore year vs. Brown in teh quarterfinals at NE regionals–that still remains the tightest game I’ve ever played in, Brown hardly turned it over all game thanks to the unstoppableness of C-Mo). Certainly a game that I was happy to end my career on.

…but then we had two more games. I was pretty banged up from the ‘zona game (bashed my knee on a bid early, and it’d been swelling up on me since), and combine that with the 5-minute break between games (going to 17-16 meant we were well past cap), and we came out flat. I only played a point in this game (though I got to finally throw the skirt on, now that we were out of contention). We were within striking distance but let this game get away from us pretty quickly.

After that, it was Delaware, and after a bye we had a lot more energy and rolled in this game. I played a few more points in this game, including the game’s final point–in a clam set, the final play of my collegiate career was a layout D, which I caught–however, given that the Del player was not anticipating my laying out for the D, he did not have time to get out of the way, and crashed into me (I was laying out perpendicular to his direction of motion–I almost never make these sorts of bids for exactly this reason). I took a (collegiate) career-ending injury, and Socks then came on to throw a breakside score for the win. A pretty fitting end for both of our careers, I’d say.

A lot of fun, is how I’d characterize it all. Really, nationals is like any other high-level college tournament–you show up, you play hard, you go home. This is the simple truth of ultimate. Why do we continue to seek glory in this piece of plastic? Well…why not?

This team is moving on already. We have our spring banquet tomorrow (which is way too soon), and after that, I’ll literally have nothing left. It’s pretty sad. You can insert a cliche about taking solace in the progress of the program, but really, there’s not too much of that sentiment right now, just nostalgia. Sitting back, reminiscing, and enjoying the memories.

I’ll likely keep updating this blog for at least the next while, but given that I’m going to be out of competitive ultimate for at least the next year (I’m teaching English in Japan), there will come a time when the new content ceases.

In the meantime, I plan to pour out the essence of my ultimate self here, various skills and teachings that I’ve acquired over my four years here. So, look forward to that I guess.

Signed,
Maaaaaaaaaaaaatt Mackey

We won.

Hoo, Ungawa, Dartmouth’s got the power, indeed. Tapering now for Regionals…